You can help your child learn social skills

By Cary and Tonja Rector

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Everyone wins when kids pitch in

By Cary and Tonja Rector

I don’t want to clean the cat’s litter box! It stinks and I have to hold my nose the whole time!” “Fold the laundry? You guys always say I should take care of my stuff. I’ll fold my own laundry, but not the whole basket.”

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Prepare for the impact of a newborn

When sentiment and reality clash, the result is stress. The birth of a baby is often such an occasion. Having a baby is a life-changing event. It’s not unusual for a couple to romanticize the idea of a newborn. The larger the gap between sentiment and reality, the greater the stress.

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Technology has created new ways for kids to hurt each other

As parents of adolescents can attest, teens use technology to socialize more than ever. Most have access to the Internet and e-mail through multiple devices such as computers, cell phones and smartphones. They use social networking sites like Facebook and MySpace. Texts and instant messages are common ways to communicate. Unfortunately their communication isn’t always positive. As adolescent use of technology has increased, so has cyberbullying.

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Parenting with consistency is a worthy goal

If you walk into any large bookstore and go to the parenting section, you will likely encounter rows of books on parenting— a great deal of information representing many different approaches. It’s a safe bet that most authors of such books consider consistent parenting essential for building a child’s sense of security and trust, and for effective discipline.

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Forging a blended family is demanding

Both adults had tears in their eyes as they explained, “We love each other, but the parenting problems are tearing us apart.” In our practice we see many different combinations of stepfamilies. Each member of a stepfamily has his or her own unique perspective, experiences and challenges. The number of children living with both biological parents has declined in recent years; however, the number of children living in a stepfamily has increased. This means many adults find themselves in the position of raising children who are not biologically their own. This article is a look at the challenges from the stepparent’s point of view.

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Parent and child must adjust to the new reality

It’s hard to believe we are heading into the fall “back to school” season already. For a select group of parents and teens, this year brings a different transition to navigate. These families are facing a child’s freshman year at college. The bags are packed, dorm assignments are in hand and moving day is scheduled.

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Does your child have the signs?

There has been a striking increase in the diagnosis of bipolar disorder in children over the past several years. Pediatric bipolar disorder is being diagnosed at a rate 40 times greater than the recent past!

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Successful marriages include four stages

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Kids can figure out the mysteries of friendships and personal conflicts

By Cary and Tonja Rector

Children rank time with their friends as a top priority. In fact, many children say social interaction is the most important part of their school day. Parents often want a better understanding of their child’s social choices and how to help when the going gets rough.

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Power struggles come to a boil at the dinner table

A pediatrician, also a good friend of ours, called to refer a 4-year-old who had refused to eat anything but Fudgy Bars and chicken McNuggets for the past two months. Indeed, any therapist working with families soon encounters problems involving some type of disturbance in the feeding relationship between parents and their children.

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Think ahead to avoid major meltdowns on the road to holiday happiness

This time of year is filled with excitement and anticipation, especially for children. Adults go to great lengths to create memorable moments for kids during the holiday season. And if those efforts end with a child in tears or a tantrum, it can be exasperating for parents. A few guidelines may help holiday plans remain a pleasant experience for parents and children.

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Play therapy helps children express concerns

By Cary and Tonja Rector

In our practice we take play seriously. Well, that’s not to say we aren’t having some fun, but we recognize how important play is to children and that it can be a powerful therapeutic tool.

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Parents must allow their adolescents to grow up

The adolescent years bring change at a pace not experienced since infancy. Physical, cognitive and psychosocial changes all come together to fuel rapid development. Understanding what is happening for your teenager on a developmental level allows parents to respond in a way that encourages mastery of essential life skills. This school year may present you and your teen with the following tasks.

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Learn to cope with sibling rivalry

"Please, please help me stop the fighting, I can’t stand it!”

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Encourage your child to try and to take risks

Of the numerous adults in a child’s life, parents are in the best position to offer their child encouragement and promote positive self-esteem—and it’s really not difficult.

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Learn to use the popular behavior modification technique

A typical toddler might require correction 100 to 150 times each day. No wonder parent and toddler are exhausted by bedtime! That’s a lot of work and fertile ground for conflict. Managing parent-child conflict may include the behavioral technique of “time-out.”

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Help your relationship survive the test of a new baby

One irony of married life is the affection and romance that lead a couple to want to start a family in the first place can be so quickly jettisoned once an actual baby enters the picture.

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Parents can do a lot to help young kids overcome fears

I knew there was something terrible down in the cellar. I just knew, because the cellar was dark and damp and it smelled.” Harry and the Terrible Whatzit (Clarion Books) by Dick Gackenbach is one of several children’s books we read with young children who come to our office because they are worried, fearful or anxious.

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New family traditions can replace those that don't work any more

For many families, the holidays include seasonal traditions. The words “we always” often mark the event. It might be “we always have Grandma’s cinnamon cookies,” or “we always” attend a particular religious service.

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Children struggle when their parents decide to separate or divorce.

By Cary and Tonja Rector

The voice on the other end of the phone is strained: “My husband and I separated three months ago. Our children are having a difficult time. What can we do to help them?”

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When it comes to homework, your middle-schooler's in charge

By Cary and Tonja Rector

Sitting in our office for the first time are a 12-year-old boy and his parents. "Bobby is not working up to his potential in school. Getting him to do homework is an argument every night!" his father says. As his parents express their worries about his academic future, Bobby stares out the office window and starts to yawn.

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